Today i realise how we go through so many emotions in a whole lifetime. In fact even in a single day u can feel so many different things. Generally you have 'happy days' and 'sad days' but a perfectly normal day can have so many progressions of so many thoughts and feelings and emotions.
Today morning i was feeling normal like everyone feels, sleepy and not willing to work. Like i said, Normal! I reached college and the first person to meet me was Best Fraand. I felt a hollow in the pit of my stomach as i remembered the beautiful time we spent last year. Attending classes made me happy about being able to understand so many things that i once never cared about (and yes i do pay attention to lectures these days). I felt a warm affection when i met cute froggy and was actually relieved because she is someone i rely on when pugsie and best fraand decide to be all analytical and ignore the universe around them (they do that a lot, although i know that its unintentional). Later in the day we talked about the movie for the lit. fest on 'Female Gaze' and i felt smart and able. And then the Dance practice? I'll have to say , smart-er and able-er!!! I realised how wonderful i feel when i see girls dancing my choreography and i can see them growing as dancers, and as individuals. Its beautiful what i create in those small hours of my day.
Evening comes and i miss Ajeeb Insaan. Night falls and i call him. And i get to hear stuff like "why are you acting like a typical girl?"... HELLO? in case you haven't realised yer... i Am a girl. And there is no such thing as 'typical' when it comes to girls (trust me on that). Anyway so i am all upset and irritated and i want him to apologize and all i get is a sleepy loser who says 'goodnight' in his sugar coated voice after he has irritated the shit out of me. I will never understand boys. I always am readily available in his time of need be it anything and he is just never there. Okay i am exaggerating a lot because these days he is very nice but i don't need to think about that right now because i am upset with him. He cannot sweet talk his way out of everything. But yeah he does try a lot!
And once i had told him off and made him super upset, i was all guilty for things which were right.
We girls are weird creatures. We cant really understand what we want but hell yeah that's how we are and the world needs to deal with it!!!
SO basically i can feel normal, smart, loved, affectionate, irritated, beautiful, lousy and guilty all in the same day. My god that's something!