Wednesday, September 30, 2009


Okay first thing first.
Capricorn boy...Awwwwwwww!!! No super duper awwwwwwww!!
Why? Because of the things he unknowingly does.

I promised myself that this blog will not become the living evidence of me gushing over my new found love but... You see its impossible not to.

But i shall still try...

Yesterday was Maggie's birthday. We spent the whole day acting (and getting) drunk. And the last minute hurry to hide the vodka quarter led to hiding of her smokes in my bag. Well it was discovered well before any harm that it could have caused. I can't imagine my mom's plight if she would have seen them in my bag. Anyway the day was Crazy. The variety of emotions continue to amuse me. Hopefully a better insight will be written by Maggie soon. And i promise to add it here when she does.

But what was better was the end to the day. I don't know if too much alcohol caused it or whatever, but I was just not getting any sleep. While desperately trying to find my lost sleep, I sent one message to Capricorn boy about something very random. And i wasn't even expecting a reply. I knew he was tired.
But, but, but...
....the unexpected!
Small things always always make me absolutely cheerful. The blushing ability proves its existence to me time and again because of these Small things.

To you-
You make me happy. Each time I talk to you i realise how important you are to me. Please don't fret about where this is going. But for once just let it go. Let it reach that place for which it started in the first place. Lets just not care and walk together, hand in hand. I don't mind if the sides we tread are different, as long as we are connected by our hands. You pave your road while i will find mine. All I am saying is that lets just remember each other when we do it...

Today was nothing great. I woke up at noon. Saw Chicago on TV (excellent movie by all means). And that's about it. The day dreams however were different. Small little instances replaced over-the-top-Bollywood-like things.

Moreover, the best-est part is that i am not obsessed with all of 'this'. Not even expectant. There are no days (yet) of 'I can't stop thinking about him'. I think that's because of the way Capricorn boy is and i give him that credit.

Oho this blog IS turning into a gushing site!!
Next post- about something else...if I can help it.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

I am back...

...and how?? (literally)

Well i missed writing for one.
And i have a so called 'new life' that needs to be talked about.
Also some really nice friends forced me to start again (Popo and Capricorn boy).

So this new life huh?
Well its called choosing studies over dance. Yes i did that. I chose to give in to the aspirations of a future that will pay my bills instead of a future that may or may not be my dream profession. I chose stability over ambiguity, security over passion. That is quite unlike me but right now I am not regretting it.

I like Advertising. Its creative enough to be not boring and is an approved (by family) field to be working in. I like my new college and i like being the 'geek' in class.

New friends? Not too many to be truthful. Oldest friend Manyu is in the adjacent block and his friend Sonam is someone i think I am close to. Close enough for me to call her my friend. Some girls in class are nice. Capricorn boy is also close. Well considering that we are dating he has to be. But is he really? I think he is. I don't know yet. It has just been 2 weeks.

So Capricorn boy? Well he is one cute thing in the department. Every girl goes ga ga over him. He is not super hot but he has that thing...that charm. You know the one where you cant help getting attracted to someone. I admit (for the first time) that i was secretly crushing on him since the minute i saw him. But then since he was way out of my 'league' ( so to say) i never tried to get close. We interacted but never enough to call each other friends. But then one fine evening while chatting on-line, he shows keen interest in choreography ventures and says he would like to talk about it more.
To cut a long story short-
Day1: Chat, Long drive, lunch with friends, drops me home.
Day2: movie, one loooooooooooong conversation in a famous coffee joint
Day3: India gate with friends, drops me home, stays over for dinner...asks me out in front of my house.

I was super shocked. Haunted by the ghosts of my sucky past relationship(s) i said some ambiguous thing about no tags and no expectations and i don't know what all. The next thing i remember is going for a night out with him (and other friends), getting close (enough) and now we spend as much time with each other as possible.

He is different. The most unimaginable kind. He is inexpressive when it comes to words but his actions are too cute. The hardcore romantic that I am, i never thought that I will date someone like him. But the little gestures, I see romance in those. He is unconventional in a lot of senses. Trying to understand him is one tough job. All my hard learned 'boy tactics' have failed me miserably when i tried them on him. I am surprised almost all the time by the way he behaves.

The tragic flaw of this oh-so-perfect-no-tags-i-am-smitten relationship is that he leaves college in 3 more months. I don't know what will happen then. It is good in a way but I think that he is holding himself back(way too much) because of this reason. And I don't like that.

Anyway as far as my feelings are concerned...they grow with each second i spend with him. I love the adorable-ness. I love figuring him out. I love waiting for him to say something that will give me a hint of what he feels. I love the fact that he is scared of saying anything that might raise my expectations. I love holding his hands. I love catching him off-guard. I love this unattached attachment and this undefined so called relationship.

So i guess that's enough of an update for one post. Rest shall follow.