Wiring problem!

Matlab hadd hai!

I don't even know what I want!

And yes this in relation to Capricorn Boy. I don't know what I want with this relationship (thats what this is, right?) And the worst of all is that I don't know what he wants. He says something but what he does conveys something else. Which one to believe now?

This is so bloody confusing na. He is so adorable. And sort of irresistible. But at the same time he has this transparent glass around him which I can't get through. He feels like a stranger yet he is so close to me. It feels so right with him but still its all wrong. Brain has all sorts of wiring disorder when it comes to him. What yaar!

I am just going to leave it now. Let it be the way it is. Stop interfering with it. I am done with being vulnerable. But it is so hard when he is around. I just cannot help wanting to be with him. And cannot help wanting to hold his hand. And hug him. And...well a lot of things.

Damn it!

Why is it so hard to let go is something I will NEVER understand.

I need sleep.

Goodnight.

*sigh*